Grace For the Recovering Perfectionist

I am a recovering perfectionist. I admit it. What do you think is the difference between perfection, striving for excellence, and doing your best?

When I was a little girl, I organized all my crayons by the rainbow-color acronym name—remember it? R-O-Y- G-  B-I-V (Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet).  I kept them organized, even if it was a box of 64 crayons. Yes, coloring inside the lines was a must. I was a born perfectionist.

Bless my sweet parents. I was harder on myself than they ever were on me.

All these years later, I still struggle with perfectionism in some areas of my life.  But who holds the measuring stick to decide what “perfect” is? Your “perfect” is different from my “perfect.” The only true measuring stick for perfection is Jesus, and nowhere this side of heaven will I, will we reach the beautiful perfection of Jesus.

I remember one role model in my career taught me this pithy poem:

Good, better, best, And may we never rest,                                                                                                                                                       Until our good is better, And our better, best.

That’s when it hit me: my best is not perfection. And that’s OK.

When I get up each morning, every fiber of my being strives for excellence. Then life happens…traffic is at a standstill, and I’m late for work; a long-anticipated meeting is rescheduled at the last minute; miscommunication occurs with a loved one; reality falls short of expectations.

One of my favorite verses is five words: “She did what she could… Mark 14:8a  NIV.  Don’t you love it? Maybe I should have that on my epitaph!  What grace! It sure makes me exhale.

To set up the scene, Jesus was visiting the home of Simon the Leper. Mary, sister of Martha and Lazarus, brought in an expensive alabaster jar full of pure nard, which is costly perfume. She took it, broke it, and poured it all on Jesus. Some of Jesus’ disciples ridiculed her for wasting more than a year’s wages of perfume on Jesus instead of giving it to the poor. Jesus told them to leave her alone and said it was a beautiful thing that she did. He told them He would not always be around and this poured perfume was preparing him for his burial. Jesus was trying to tell them he would soon die.

Mary did what she could. It may not have been “perfect” or even “excellent” in the sight of the disciples. She gave it her all.

Dear friends, there is grace for those of us recovering from perfectionism. Keep doing your best, and react with grace knowing obstacles will come into your divine path. Be encouraged. You are making a difference.

Relax. Breathe deeply.  Exhale. Laugh. His grace is sufficient for you and for me. Feel free to color outside the lines sometimes.

Reflect:

–What are some ways you are a recovering perfectionist like me? Please comment.

-What grace can you give yourself or a loved one who struggles with perfectionism?

–How can you make sure your heart is in all your work? Please leave a comment and let me know.

Renew:

–“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” –2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV

–“Finally, brothers, good-by. Aim for perfection, listen to my appeal, be of one mind, live in peace. And the God of love and peace will be with you.” –2 Corinthians 13:11 NIV.

–“Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.” –Galatians 1:10 NIV

Resource:

PS. Today is also a great day to print out my “Creating Your Personal Mission Statement Template,” which is free by simply adding your email address and subscribing to this little leap-of-faith “Pure Inspiration” blog.

Help For the Stubborn: Calling As At Other Times

I’ve been known to be stubborn.  It’s embarrassing to confess that to you. When my will yields to God’s, though, it thrills my heart. To hear God speaking, calling me brings so much peace.

Samuel in the Bible experienced that peace when he said, “Here I am; You called me.”  It’s a scripture response and passage you may have heard before, but I just noticed five words of this profound Bible story I had never paid attention to before.

 “The boy Samuel ministered before the Lord under Eli. In those days the word of the Lord was rare; there were not many visions. ..

Then the Lord called Samuel. Samuel answered, ‘Here I am.’ And he ran to Eli and said, ‘Here I am; you called me.’ But Eli said, ‘I did not call; go back and lie down.’ So he went and lay down.

God called him again. Then Eli realized that the Lord was calling the boy. So Eli told Samuel, ‘Go and lie down, and if he calls you, say, ‘Speak, Lord, for Your servant is listening.’ So Samuel went and lay down in his place. The Lord came and stood there, calling as at other times, ‘Samuel! Samuel!’ Then Samuel said, ‘Speak, for your servant is listening.’” –1 Samuel 3:1, 4-11 NIV

Did you notice it? The Lord came and stood there, calling as at other times…That phrase hit me over the head.

God talks with us all the time, yet we are so distracted, we do not listen. Or we may think it’s someone/something else, not God. It took Eli to prepare Samuel to really listen the next time the Lord “came and stood there” and called him. How often do we blow off the Eli’s in our lives and dismiss their insight?

Who is an Eli in your life, who can help you  focus on God, preparing you to listen to Him calling you? The Lord is talking to you, calling your name, calling as at other times. Listen to God, and listen to your “Eli”, so you can listen to Him.

It has been a blessing for God to call me to work at Proverbs 31 Ministries in Matthews, NC and to relocate here. It took me a while to hear Him speaking to me.

Lord Jesus, thank you for yielding my stubborn heart. Thank You for slowing my pace so that I may hear You speaking clearly, Lord. “Speak, for your servant is listening.”

Reflect:

–Do you find that your world is noisy, distracted, hard to hear God? Please comment.

–Who is an Eli in your life? Please comment.

Renew:

–“And the Lord said to Samuel: ‘See, I am about to do something in Israel that will make the ears of everyone who hears of it tingle.’ …The Lord was with Samuel as he grew up, and He let none of his words fall to the ground. And all Israel from Dan to Beersheba recognized that Samuel was attested as a prophet of the Lord.” –1 Samuel 3: 11, 19-20 NIV

–“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” –Psalm 46:10 NIV

Recharge:

–What will you do this week to quiet yourself, focus, and listen? Shhh… can you hear Him calling as at other times?

Wisdom From Wise Women–She Speaks 2015

Hi Friends!

Since we just returned home from the amazing Proverbs 31 Ministries She Speaks 2015 conference, I thought of sharing just a few profound sticky statements from some of the most godly, wise leaders with whom I have ever had the blessing of serving. My hand couldn’t write down their wisdom fast enough. May you be as encouraged by these Bible-centered truths as I am.

  • “We must stay in alignment with His assignment.” –Lysa TerKeurst
  • “God calls us to 1) Be with Him and 2) Be sent out by Him. ” –Lysa TerKeurst
  • “The Gospel is a change agent. God loves you as you are, but He doesn’t want you to stay that way.” –Whitney Capps
  • “The Comforter will comfort. Sometimes our Bible teaching will make them feel uncomfortable.” –Whitney Capps
  • “There’s no such thing as fame in the eyes of the Famous One.” –Whitney Capps
  • “The only good in us is God in us.” –Liz Curtis Higgs
  • “We need God-confidence, not self-confidence.” –Liz Curtis Higgs
  • “God can redeem our mess with His best.” –Liz Curtis Higgs
  • “Serving God may mean holding a broom, not a microphone.” –Liz Curtis Higgs
  • “Pretending you’re fine when you’re really not fine never healed any kind of brokenness.” –Lysa TerKeurst
  • “We at Proverbs 31 Ministries take the Bible literally, not liberally.” –Lysa TerKeurst